D3 body, D1 cock
I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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