it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
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