You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
