Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
