theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
if i died would you start the facebook group?
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Randomize
