i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
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