I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
kristin has been a bad kristin
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Randomize
