I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
