This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
