We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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