my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
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