"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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