I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Randomize