Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Randomize