I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
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