Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize
