I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
