Little spoons don't ask big questions
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
Randomize
