Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
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