It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
porn star boner night. come get it.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize
