hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Randomize
