Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
I still have a little drunk in my system
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Randomize
