Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Randomize
