I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
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