weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Randomize
