Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I showed him my bush... on skype.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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