my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
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