Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
