So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
