You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
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