I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Randomize