Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Randomize
