How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
