just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
