Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
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