omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
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