So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
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