your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
Kareoke will never be a sober sport
My liver just broke up with me...
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
