what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
