Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Randomize
