nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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