If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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