Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize
