Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Randomize
