question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Randomize
