I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Just cropdusted the office
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
