It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
