I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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