She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
