He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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